Learning to Love an Abusive Employee
Atlanta, GA
November 9, 2022
For several years, our long-time housekeeper has been embezzling money, breaking our things, siphoning our gas, and sharing pornography with our impressionable kids.
One day, this uppity servant stole our keys and locked us inside. She’d let us out periodically, but only to go to specific places for certain things.
To preserve our health, she demanded we keep our distance, cover our faces, and take a new medication a friend of hers cooked up. Unless we did, we might never be allowed to leave.
But she hardly ever cleaned the house. As it fell into disrepair, she reminded us how lucky we were to have a roof over our head, and someone like her who was willing to protect us.
We weren’t so sure. My wife wondered if we shouldn’t get a new maid. I began looking around, and even interviewed a few prospects whenever our current cleaning lady let us go outside.
A few candidates wondered why we paid someone so much to treat us so poorly. They assured us that if we hired them, all they’d do is clean our house, which our present employee was failing to do. Otherwise, they’d leave our kids alone, stop destroying our property, not force us to take drugs, and let us leave whenever we wanted.
That sounded good, but seemed risky. Was it safe? I knew we were being mistreated, but it was for our own good. Without an employee bossing us around, I wasn’t sure we’d be able to take care of ourselves. What we had wasn’t ideal, but at least it was familiar.
My wife and I thought it over, and came to the only decision a reasonable person could be expected to make. We retained our abusive housekeeper.
After all, she said she was sorry for some of what she’d been forced to do, and denied the rest even happened. That was good enough for us. Apparently, all the damage she’d done and carnage she’d inflicted was a figment of our imagination.
We apologized for the misunderstanding, and promised to be more appreciative. We assured her such ingratitude would never happen again. After all, when it came to tending house, she was the expert.
To show our sincerity and convince her of our remorse, we agreed to extend her contract for four years, and give her a raise.
We apologized that we considered replacing her, and I think she forgave us. But to ensure she does, we’ll do all we can to not offend her again. Besides, she promised she’d stop engaging in all the crimes she swore she never committed. And now that we’ve rewarded her despite her misdeeds, what incentive does she have to renege on her word?
We’ve made her realize that no matter what atrocities she perpetrates, she’ll never be punished. Our only fear is that she won’t stay. After all, for more money, greater power, guaranteed victory, almost total discretion, and little accountability, she can run for office in places like Michigan, New York, Pennsylvania, or California.
Apparently, people there will put up with anything.
JD
